So when you’re young you celebrate all of your holidays with the family you’re born into, and sometimes that tradition carries into your adult-hood. In my case, I find my self celebrating my holidays more and more with my chosen family. I wasn’t given a choice about who I was born to, how I was raised or how I was treated by my extended blood family. Now, as an adult, I make the choices about being with people who genuinely enjoy me, who love me and who care about my well-being – even if that means they hold me when I cry. I belive my parents love me very much, but negative emotion wasn’t welcome at my child-hood home, so I learned early to just choke back and suppress any unwanted emotion and only display what is positive even if it was a total lie. I don’t live that way any-more. I have the right to feel how I feel with no apologies and no guilt. I embrace all of my emotions and don’t worry about what’s politically correct or socially acceptable. I embrace the truth of the moment and I don’t continually censor myself any-more. Now I approach the holidays with the thought of… “What’s healthy for me?” not “What will make everyone around me like me or approve of me?”
This year I have spent Christmas day with my best friend and my husband, two of the only people who truly feel like family to me, two people who really know me and love all of me, not just the acceptable opinions and attitudes… I will also be ringing in the New Year with them and I can’t think of a more peaceful way to begin my year than to be surrounded by love and acceptance. I am truly grateful to have been given a new definition of love and of family this year.

Hi captivatingbitter, you are correct, you must no longer live for the sake of others, for their opinions of you. You must live for your sake and feel freedom of self expression. True: We do not choose our birth families, and unfortunately, as we mature we realize, sometimes, that our true families care and even love us less than our chosen families. This sad truth permeates society and until families learn or are taught “how to love,” the misfortune would continue.
Yes, embrace every moment live your life, and without apologies. WITHOUT GUILT. Embracing your emotions honestly and ignoring social expectations, which negate you, is wonderful and a positive way of living (your) life. Continue this throughout your lifetime and the road to true happiness lives before you.
You have your husband and chosen family and those, hopefully, of your true family who love and cherish you as you are, yes, do embrace them and fully.
LIVE LIFE FULLY HONESTLY…IN TRUTH.
That is definately what I want… an honest life – one in which I don’t have to hide anymore… on in which I can give and receive love and no longer fear retribution, manipulation, humiliation. I want to know my emotions are safe and worthy. I don’t want to live in fear and I am tired of seeing myself as a broken.
Yes, you should and will have your wants, but you MUST make it happen. Let n-one, nothing stop you.
You must demand you must become you must LIVE as you FEEL.
“NOW GO DO IT.”
Correction: Sentence#2: (n-one) should be no-one: Please excuse the typo.